Salt Lake City Temple

Jon and I decided to go take pictures on temple square...

Time Management & Finances

TIME MANAGEMENT / FINANCES

Lately I've been noticing that my day consists of a lot of... well, "work" if you will. I get up, get ready for work, go to work, come home, take care of Knox, clean, help with dinner, edit, do laundry, run errands, and... I don't know... whatever else needs to be done. Making a "work-day" not really end until around midnight. I don't know the last time I laid down on the couch just to rest my feet, but I do remember that when I did it, it felt foreign. Like I hadn't done it in years. I know it hasn't really been that long, but it sure felt like it, and I don't even know how long ago that experience was...

Along with that... and I think its probably only natural with a new little baby and being away from home for most of his awake hours... I've just been dying for leisure time with my family. I suddenly just want life to slow down and for me to start enjoying things instead of letting all these moments pass while I busily race along.

So that's what set the stage for this huge change in me... but here was my thought process...

Years ago I took an anthropology class. We studied the Kung people, an aborigine tribe in... I don't know... somewhere in the Kalahari, on the Southern end of Africa. I wish I had numbers but all I remember is that the percentage of "work" they did during the day was like nothing compared to ours. We're talking one or two hours compared to our 16... and you know what? That sounds quite nice right now! And they live happily with nothing compared to what we have.

So I decided we need to simplify our lives! And that simplification effects everything (finances, home, future stability, spirituality, health, etc.).

Now, because I want to make movies and I believe in Jon's ability to write, I want him to be a stay at home parent. I want him to spend his free time writing. And he wants that too. So with that I have to work extra hard to make up the income we would be making if he were a part of the workforce. I have a regular 9-5, I've been doing freelance for a company and we've booked a few weddings. I've also been thinking about other ways to bring in some extra cash... but over and above my 9-5 its just taking time away from being with my family... and so it doesn't really seem worth it...

So I'm giving all that extra stuff up! Which in turn means we need to seriously cut costs and here's how we're doing it...

Moving to a new apartment:

Current:
     1300 sqft @ $905
     WSG @ $40

New:
     900 sqft @ $590
     WSG @ $0

Savings: $355

This will also effect what we're paying on Gas and Electric but I'm not sure how much yet.

I started taking the bus instead of driving:

Gas: $175
Bus pass: $40
Savings: $135


We cut our phone bill down:

1400 minutes @ $80
700 minutes @ $60

I'll also be getting rid of my data pack but I have to get a new phone because my current phone requires it...

Current data pack @ $11

Savings: $31

The list goes on to include Netflix, calling student loan places to get the prices lowered, shopping with coupons, etc.

And since we're moving to a smaller place we're getting rid of a lot of extra stuff, stuff we don't need. We've sold old cameras and DVD players... we had a yard sale and made $530... awesome! And we still have loads more stuff that we'll be finding as we prepare to relocate. We're going through everything and deciding if we need/want to keep it or if we can get rid of it. We'll have a trash box, a DI box, and a yard sale box.

This is where our story ends for right now... this is really as far as we've gotten. We have a lot to do tomorrow and I'm excited. I'll be telling more as we progress so I'll keep you posted. Wish us luck!!!

PS. Jon pointed out: that's a savings of $521/month and $6252/year. Sweet!!!

Taking "Me" Back

PURPOSE

First off I need to say that I am so grateful to have little Knox! He brings me probably the greatest joy I've ever felt... I never thought I'd say that about a kid, but its true.

Along with that though, I'm also SO grateful that Jon and I got married so young (I was 22 and he was 23) and that we waited 8 years to have kids. Theres not one part of me that regrets it. Not one! I might be singing a different tune when I'm old but right now, I've never been more grateful!!!

However, a lot of things change when you have a kid. Where it use to be easy to fit loads of work and fun into a single day, I'm struggling to find time for either. I've lost a lot of the baby weight but I'm still many sizes from fitting into my wardrobe. Our house is filling up with baby crap and the end to spending seems nowhere in sight... Life is literally running away from me and if I don't take ME back soon, I hate to see how we'll end up!!!

So, what does taking "Me" back mean?

It means I run the day - my day doesn't run me! I need to take control of my life again. An action I believe will positively effect myself, my family and our future.

So with that, here are the areas of my life I need to change, simplify and improve upon, in no particular order:

1. Time Management
2. Finances
3. Health
4. Home
5. Secure stability for my future
6. Spirituality

Stay tuned for posts on each... 

Knox [Four Months]

 

 

Knox [Three Months]

Knox [Two Months]

 

 

 

Labor

Disclaimer: This post will most likely have some information that would definitely qualify as TMI. I'm posting it because I wanted as much information as possible when I was going through it and I thought my input would help someone else.

I know that everyone's experience is different so take it for what its worth, but when I was pregnant and prior to pregnancy, I wanted to know what the heck it was all about. I felt like I always heard women say (in what always sounds like a negative tone) "yeah, wait till you get pregnant," or "wait till you have kids," or all the drama that's made about how it ruins your body and stuff. Anyhow, it made me NEVER want to have kids. I'm talking NEVER!!! Plus - they're freaking loud as heck at church and I was in primary long enough to scar me for life. But anyhow, I have to admit, the only reason I did it was because I knew that it was for sure my time. Inspiration - if you will. But even after I got pregnant I was a bit bummed out for the first few months. My life and body were ruined! Or so I thought...

Anyhow, regarding labor:

People always say there is nothing they can tell you that could prepare you for the pain you'll feel during labor. Um, I beg to differ. I have 10 words for you...

Lactose intolerance, lower back pain, biggest crap of your life!!!

So I'm just going to tell you how it went down and maybe something will apply to you.

First off, I went natural, and in case you're not totally sure what this means... like myself, I was pretty clueless (which is why I have some stuff in italics below... that's all stuff I learned from the experience)... this means I did not get an epidural. I have a bunch of reasons for not...

• I'm afraid of the needle
• I had spinal surgery years ago
• I'm afraid of dealing with whatever consequences might come if the anesthesiologist screws up
• I'm not a fan of medication (for myself... but in general I know its a good thing to have)
• I had a funny little mess up in high school and now I can't stand not being in control of my body (drug-wise)

However, I did use morphine, and that was AWESOME!!!

Okay, so anyhow...

The beginning of January I went in and was already dilated to a 2 and 75% effaced. The Dr thought I would pop by the end of the month and I was stoked!

75% effaced means 75% of my cervix was gone.

So, two weeks later I went back and I hadn't budged, except now I was 80% effaced. Two weeks went by and I was finally at a 3... but I stayed that way until my due date, which was February 10th. I wasn't moving at all and the Dr suggested I be induced. He knew I wanted to go natural so he said he's able to give me one more week but he couldn't promise there would be any change and I'd have to be induced by the end of that next week.

Going natural you don't want to be induced because it'll make your contractions a hundred times worse.

If you wait longer than a week past your due date it increases your chances of still birth.

So, the Dr. went out of the room and Jon and I started talking... if we wait, the baby will be bigger, I'll be pregnant another week, there's no guarantee it'll happen naturally and my birthday and our anniversary was that weekend. So we decided we'd find out our options when the Dr. came back in... The Dr.'s plan was this: Sunday the 12th at 10PM I'd check into the hospital, and they'd give me a dose of a cervidale.

Cervidale is used to thin out your cervix. My sister told me that when she got it, it was so painful she sat in the shower crying from the pain. This would be the first tier of pain.

Then at 6AM they would break my water.

Breaking the water makes the pain more severe. This would have been the second tier of pain.

Then they'd start me on petosin.

This is what they use when they say "you're being induced." Petosin is what puts you in labor and if you're going natural its very painful. Contractions have a gradual beginning, a peak and then a decline and they gradually get stronger... but with petosin they're sharper and you're not weened into the pain, it just starts. So its pretty painful.

Then he figured sometime around noon Knox would be delivered. I reluctantly agreed, knowing that if I wussed out, I didn't have to go to the hospital, I could just wait.

The Dr.'s big hope was that since I was at a 3 and 80% effaced that the cervidale would knock me into labor, but he wasn't going to count on that. This Dr. appointment was on Friday and I had until Sunday to make myself pop naturally... the only way to ensure I wouldn't be induced... I tried everything! Twice... Nothing worked.

I like to test myself and this seemed like the ultimate test to me, but I have to admit, Saturday night I was balling in the shower because of being so freaked out! I kept going back and forth on sticking with Sunday or wussing out. But every time I prayed about it, I knew it was right, and there were a lot of little things that told me it was right. The scriptures I would open up to all had to do with manning up and facing your fears for the greater good and that the experience would benefit me. The talks at church that day were all on the same topic... and the funny thing. Like during the whole pregnancy I kept telling Jon I wanted it to rain when I went into labor... it rained that day. LOL. I know its silly but it meant something to me... Anyhow, I knew it was right... so I went...

So at 10PM we went to the hospital. I told the nurse the Dr's goal about the cervidale knocking me into labor and she laughed and said that she'd been a nurse for 15 years and had only seen that work once...  Jon and I just looked at each other... I think we were both counting on that saving me from the pain. But anyhow, by 11PM they had given me my first dose of cervidale and told me to go to sleep that tomorrow would be a long day... so I did... Well, as much as I could... the delivery bed is not as comfortable as a regular hospital bed. Anyhow, at 3:30AM the nurse woke me up and asked if I was feeling any contractions. I wasn't but apparently they were coming every 3-4 minutes. So she gave me another dose and told me to go back to bed... so I did...

Cervedales can be given two different ways... one goes "down there"... the other is a pill. My sister got the first and that might be why hers was so painful... I got the pill and didn't notice any changes happening to my body.

So that was at 3:30AM and at 4:30AM I woke up with what felt like a sift, extremely direct kick, with perfect aim, right in the butt. I didn't know if I suddenly had to rock one, or if Knox had just hit me, or if it was a dream... it was so sharp and quick that I was like... did that really happen? Then the stomach ache started and I was like, OH NO! I'm having a lactose intolerance attack. CRAP! Worse timing ever!!! So I got up and was a little freaked out bracing myself at the foot of my bed, I wasn't sure what to do... I stood frozen for about 15 minutes before I woke Jon up and asked him if he was feeling sick, but he was fine. Then the lower back pain gradually started with each spell of lactose intolerance pain and Jon told me to call the nurse... so I did...

Funny thing... Jon had a kidney stone years ago and thought he was having a lactose intolerance attack... people say kidney stones are the closest a guy can come to feeling the pain of having a baby... so when I was trying to figure out what it would feel like, Jon said, "its probably like a lactose intolerance attack"... one of two people who described the pain the best... a guy... funny right!

So when the nurse came in she checked me and found that I was now dilated to a 5 and she offered me morphine, which I gladly accepted. It was awesome and totally took the lactose intolerance pain away and the edge off the lower back pain.

Lactose intolerance pains are like contractions because if they were on a graph they'd form a little hill. Starting soft, a gradual incline, a peak and then it descends as it fades away.

Anyhow, around 5 / 5:30AM I asked the nurse to check me again because the pain had taken a noticeable step up.

Also, for me, the lower back pain was the worst pain of the labor. Which is probably why they give epidurals because its to numb the lower back.

I was at an 8. With that the nurses jumped into gear and started to zip in and out, prepping the room. They told me that I would start to feel like I wanted to push but I shouldn't do that yet.

If you push before you're at a 10, I believe its your uterus... anyway, it can swell and that's bad. 

To be honest it wasn't hard not to push. The only time it was, was when I had to pee and that's only because I was sitting on a toilet and labor feels like all the fuss is over one giant crap that you need to get out of your body.

Anyhow, when I went to the bathroom all my inhibitions were shot and I totally peed with the door open in front of Jon and a bunch of nurses coming in and out of the room. But the weird thing was that I couldn't pee, I think Knox's weight was stopping it. I had to push a little but was finally able to and with that a contraction started and I leaned over and asked Jon to rub my back... on the toilet and everything... but apparently when I leaned over Jon looked in the toilet and noticed that my water had broken but didn't want to tell me and freak me out. So he went out and tried telling the nurses but they weren't paying him much attention, so when I finally got out and they checked me again the nurse was like... did your water break? Jon was like... UH YEAH!

Apparently Jon knew it was the water that had broken because it was cloudy. I'm only telling you this because I always wondered if I would be confused and think I had peed myself. Apparently they look different so you'll be able to tell.

It was about this time that I started to feel like I had to crap and my body wanted to push (not in a gross poo way, but that's actually what labor feels like), so knowing that I wasn't supposed to push, every once in a while I'd just flex my stomach and it would lessen the urge.

At 6:30AM I was at a 10. They gave me the green light on pushing but I wasn't allowed to push too hard before the Dr. arrived.

Side note... people alway say that pushing makes the pain go away... I can't say that's totally true... it just makes the pain a little more subdued. If you push instinctively it was way less painful than when the nurses told me to push for 10. 

When Dr. Ward finally entered the building, two nurses (one on each side) grabbed my legs, held them up to my chest and told me to bear down.

Bear down means to push as hard as you can.

I did but after the first go I knew it didn't feel right, I was pushing too soon and my body, though dilated to a 10, wasn't ready. Plus, for the first five seconds it takes the contraction pain away but at 5 the back pain would shoot back in and I'd lose any push power. Anyway, after that I pushed a few times at their demand but had they read my birth plan they'd know I wanted to push instinctively and this was not instinctively. So I kept pushing their hands away and trying to get them away from me but they kept trying.

For me, this knees to chest way of pushing is so uncomfortable. They only do it that way because it opens the junk up more. I tried the bath and walking for contractions and that didn't work at all for me. And even having Jon rub my back, like they always suggest, made the pain worse. It was best to just not have anyone touch me and take the pain myself. And even pushing, I felt best when I was laying on my back with my legs in the air criss crossed. I'd hold my feet with one and and push. That felt fabulous! But the nurses wouldn't let me do it, which now annoys the crap out of me, but whatever... I'll know for next time... if there is a next time...

Luckily the Dr arrived. I pushed a few times at their demand but kept asking to push instinctively and finally the Dr told them to let me do it at my own time. I was so grateful!!! So I took a few contractions, pushed my own way and then I was ready.

With that a bunch of nurses came back in, I now let them pull my knees up without fighting them and started to push. After a push or two the Dr said that there was an area that would most likely rip and so he cut it but I ripped anyway. Just a little bit though - luckily. I've heard horror stories about that.

Cutting is called an episiotomy. I told Dr. I didn't want one unless absolutely necessary. Now, along with that, I don't know if I ripped because of the episiotomy or if I ripped so little because of it. Like did it cause the rip or did it save me from something even worse? I don't know... But I wouldn't recommend getting it unless the Dr sees its necessary because it takes way longer to heal. And it was very hard to sit down for a little more than a week. I had to sit on pillows to work.

Anyhow, this last half... when I was at a 10... the sensation of having to crap was so strong. I kept telling Jon that I just wanted it to be over so I could rock one. I think I said it like every 10 minutes or less for who knows how long. And even more, it started to feel like the biggest crap of your life... The the crap of all craps... The crap to make all other craps seem like a shart... A crap that would seriously rip you a new one... you get the picture...

Anyhow, the reason it felt so intense was because it was the head. I don't remember really having the lactose intolerance pain anymore but the back pain was pretty bad, or maybe I'm just a wuss when it comes to back pain. So basically back and butt pain. Both were like really sharp pains... more like a sting.

But the best part... once the head came out all the pain was gone! And the body is all bumpy because of shoulders and legs and stuff... and its all slimy... so when that part came out it honestly felt like a little massage to the area that had just had so much pain. It honestly made it feel better. Heavenly Father knows what he's doing...

Last was the placenta and that hurts a little coming out, but after the head it felt like nothing.

Anyhow, that was labor for me and Knox was born at 7:58PM... I don't know that I'll do it again... and I don't judge people who want an epidural... I say kudos to them for having the balls to get it... I was a wuss... but all-in-all... if I had to do it again, I'd still go natural.

That's my labor story. Hope it didn't scare you to death, I hope it just gave you one account and you can use it as you please. I just hope it gives you a little glimps into what the experience was like for me so you're not totally clueless. So again, hope it helps.

PS. I gave credit to Jon for the lactose intolerance reference. Cass, my sister, coined the phrase "the biggest crap of your life," and both she and my mom warned me about the back pain.

OH! Tips...

• Everyone says to sleep in the hospital because you'll need it. Do! We just wrote that off and regretted it.
• If you've never really bathed a new born, go with the nurse to do it. Jon and I were clueless and still were, even after we watched the nurse but a few things stuck.
• Have something you can put the kid on after you have them... like a seat... so you don't have to hold them 24/7. Jon and I were sleep deprived and at a breaking point. A little swing saved us.
• Don't scrimp on diapers! Pampers are the best, Huggies suck... they leak like crazy!
• And despite what everyone says, YOU CAN OVERFEED A BABY!!! We did because he had a stomach ache and thought it meant he was hungry.
• Diaper rash - screw meds... use bag balm (you can get it in the meds section of Costco or on Amazon), and cornstartch. Took it away in a day and you don't have to call poison control if you get it near their face. :)
• The people who bring you food are lifesavers because you probably would forget to eat if they weren't there!!!

And about your body -

• People say you drop 20lbs instantly... Not so for me... I dropped 10 sometime in the first week, then another 10 after the 1st month, and so forth... I was back to my pre-pregnancy weight 3-4 months after I popped.
• One thing no one mentioned was that it hurt like CRAZY to take care of buidness afterward... I'm talking about rocking a duce... I don't know what it feels like to anyone else but I would go to the farthest bathroom because I would be in tears... it went on for about 6 months... horrible, horrible pain!!! Well, I just found out like a month ago that you're not supposed to have that pain. It means there was a tear inside that I didn't get fixed right away. It of course healed over time but tell your Dr. if you have severe pain while taking care of buidness... they have a pill you can take (or something like that) that will heal it
• Not everyone gets roids. I did not! And I'm so grateful!!! That was one of my biggest fears!!!

Knox [One Month]

Knox [First Two Weeks]

Pregnancy

Disclaimer: This post will most likely have some information that would definitely qualify as TMI. I'm posting it because I wanted as much information as possible when I was going through it and I thought my input would help someone else.

I know that everyone's experience is different so take it for what its worth, but when I was pregnant and prior to pregnancy, I wanted to know what the heck it was all about. I felt like I always heard women say (in what always sounds like a negative tone) "yeah, wait till you get pregnant," or "wait till you have kids," or all the drama that's made about how it ruins your body and stuff. Anyhow, it made me NEVER want to have kids. I'm talking NEVER!!! Plus - they're freaking loud as heck at church and I was in primary long enough to scar me for life. But anyhow, I have to admit, the only reason I did it was because I knew that it was for sure my time. Inspiration - if you will. But even after I got pregnant I was a bit bummed out for the first few months. My life and body were ruined! Or so I thought...

Anyhow, regarding pregnancy:

First off, this is totally my opinion, but when people say: "you'll never be ready," in a way that tells you to just have kids now - that's bull!!! You will reach a point when it doesn't matter that you haven't got the home or job you want, you'll just know its the right time. Even if it is 8 years down the road. I am so glad we didn't succumb to all the people who fed us that line. Everyone is different and gets there at a different time and well... that's okay because its between you and Heavenly Father.

Second, the body during pregnancy... People make it sound like you have zero bladder control... you pee every two seconds and every time you sneeze or laugh... not so...

I went through spells of having to pee like crazy: about a month at the beginning, about a month in the middle and then at the very end. But it wasn't an inconvenience because all of the changes on your body are so subtle that you don't really notice them.

The only time it applied to me was during about the last month, and that's only because at that stage they double in size and their head rests right on your bladder. So for me I would be fine and then when I had to pee, I was like WHERE IS A BATHROOM! The sensation of holding it for a while would come on pretty fast... but only when I was walking around... I don't remember getting that feeling when I was sitting... and it was probably every hour and a half or so. I never experienced peeing on myself while laughing. I do admit that I had a few sneeze episodes but ONLY when I was about to use the bathroom... like already in there and about to do my thing. I guess just because my guard was down or something. Oh, and one time I was sick and Jon talked me into using a netty pot and he kept saying I was using it right but it was making me want to hurl... and then I started to hurl... yeah... you pee when you puke (but I puked a lot during pregnancy and only had that issue in my last month sooo... I wouldn't be worried about the pee thing... and again, its a subtle change and happens so rarely that I wouldn't be concerned. And its not like you pee all over yourself, its like a super small amount, just a few drops that break through and that's about it.

Along with that people make things sound long lasting and totally extreme... not always... I only had one week where I was craving salsa, one week where smells got to me, and one week of extreme PMS (this was about two weeks into pregnancy, maybe three, and then it was gone).

However, I did have extreme "morning sickness," and it was not just in the morning. It lasted about two months for me (months 4 and 5), but they have pills that can help you to feel better... I didn't discover them until my last two weeks of morning sickness but it was still worth it. And to help myself make it through at work, I would eat grapes when I felt sick. Last, I had energy the whole time... almost till the end. I started to get a little tired at the end, but that's because again... at the end, they double in size so a lot of positions and movements become awkward. And I think my body would try to do the movements and because I couldn't, or at least not with ease, trying wore me out and then my body just took that to say, hey... I'm tired... I can't bend over... I want to just lay down.

Oh, there were only two things that drove me nuts during pregnancy. 1.) the morning sickness, 2.) For the first few months I was starving, nonstop! I could eat a huge meal and then within five minutes my stomach was burning like I hadn't eaten all day. I didn't want to get huge so I started taking grapes, baby carrots and goldfish with me everywhere. I'd just munch on them between meals. It worked well too because during my first five months I only gained five pounds.

However, around six months Jon and I started to go broke because of my job situation, and my sister was nice enough to take me out to lunch a lot to make sure I ate while at work. So nice of her!!! The only problem is that I can't say no to food and it was quite often the fast kind and well.. I gained 20lbs in 2 months!!! WOW!!! That was months 6 and 7. Something else that came from this diet change... I started to get heart burn. If I could go back, I would have made fast food trips a totally rare thing!!! That's one of my biggest regrets.

My other regret is that I didn't use lotion on my stomach enough. I got stretch marks... So, I was told, when your stomach itches, put lotion on and don't scratch it because that's how you get stretch marks. I say don't wait till it itches, just use lotion! My stomach wasn't the itchy type and the stretch marks showed up over night. That's not an exaggeration, it was a literal overnight change! What I wish I would have done, is the day the Dr said the baby was going to double in size (starting during the 7th month), I should have started that day applying lotion... I waited till month 8 and not on a daily basis...

Soo... basically, as of right now, two pieces are a thing of the past. I'm very disappointed in myself... it was my own mistake and I'm now using maderma twice a day... and luckily its on my lower stomach so at least its not all over like I've seen online.

Anyhow, I think that's about all I can think of regarding pregnancy. But all-in-all, it wasn't bad at all. The changes were so subtle that it doesn't feel weird and doesn't feel like an inconvenience or anything. However, when the baby starts kicking, it feels really funny, but not terrible, just weird. Take your thumb and do a little jab into your stomach... that's what it felt like... but from the inside out. And when it gets bigger, its even more interesting. Really cool-interesting though.

Okay, so I can't think of anything else about pregnancy but if you have any questions let me know. I can help out as much as I can.

Cathedral of Madeline

This place was gorgeous and took me back to my catholic days. 

Senior Pics - Camry Shipp